Reviewed by Madeline Ruffinott, MOT, OTR/L
Play is a cornerstone of childhood as it helps to foster communication skills, a sense of belonging, and offers natural opportunities to practice emotional regulation skills. For young children, learning how to build friendships often begins through play.
As parents, you play a pivotal role in encouraging your child to develop the skills they need to form meaningful friendships. Here’s how you can support your child in building good friends through the magic of play.
How Play Helps Children Build Friendships
Play is a natural setting where children learn to navigate social situations, cooperate with others, and resolve conflicts. Whether it’s a game of tag, building a fort, or sharing crayons, these activities give your child a chance to practice friendship skills in a safe and intrinsically motivating environment. As Children grow, they move through various stages of play development which include:
- Solitary Play and Onlooker Play (up to around 2 years old): Children begin first by playing alone exploring various objects as they gain proficiency in motor skills.
- Parallel Play (2 years old): In this stage of play development, children begin to be around peers more often where they begin to model their peers. While they may still play largely independently they may “mirror” the play of others. Think of two children playing in a sandbox on the playground. In this stage of development, one child may be building a sandcastle and the other may be digging in the sand with trucks.
- Associative Play (3-4years old): This is the play stage where friendships start to emerge. These pre-school age children are beginning to share, collaborate during imaginative play, and begin to play simple games with others. This is a period of development where friendships begin to flourish as children have increased opportunities to practice joint decision making, social problem solving, and taking turns to support overall social development.
- Cooperative and Competitive Play (5 years old): During this type of play, children become masters of working together to achieve a common goal such as winning a sports game or putting on a theatrical performance. During this stage of play development, children often begin participating in organized sports activities. These types of experiences help children to learn increased problem solving and conflict resolution skills that carry with them throughout life.
By engaging in diverse types of play, children develop social skills that lay the foundation for lifelong, meaningful friendships. As children grow, they continue to move in and out of each of these types of play as they further develop their friendship making skills through practice.
Tips for Encouraging Your Child to Build Friendships
- Model Positive Behavior
Children often learn by observing their parents. When you model positive communication skills, empathy, and kindness in your interactions, your child is more likely to emulate those behaviors in their own relationships.
For example, demonstrate active listening and respectful conversation when resolving conflicts at home. These examples help your child feel confident in social situations with peers.
- Facilitate Play with Peers
Creating opportunities for your child to play with peers is essential for building social skills. Arrange playdates, join local playgroups, or enroll your child in group activities where they can interact with others.
These experiences give your child a chance to practice sharing, turn-taking, and cooperation—key components of friendship skills.
- Encourage Cooperative Play
Activities that require teamwork, such as board games, building blocks, or group art projects, encourage children to collaborate and communicate. Cooperative play also helps them understand the value of working together and strengthens their ability to connect with others.
- Teach Problem-Solving Skills
When conflicts arise during play, use these moments as teaching opportunities. Guide your child in resolving disagreements by helping them identify the problem, brainstorm solutions, and choose a course of action.
For instance, if two children want the same toy, encourage them to take turns or find a way to use it together. These experiences build resilience and teach children how to manage social challenges effectively.
- Celebrate Small Wins
When your child makes a new friend, handles a disagreement calmly, or shares toys without prompting, celebrate their progress. Positive reinforcement boosts their confidence and motivates them to continue building friendships.
The Role of Parents in Friendship Development
Parents are their child’s first teachers, and your support is invaluable in helping your child feel comfortable navigating social situations. By fostering a home environment that values kindness, respect, and empathy, you provide a strong foundation for your child’s social growth.
Remember, building friendships is a journey that takes time and practice. By being patient, encouraging your child, and providing them with opportunities to play and interact with others, you’re setting them up for success in developing meaningful friendships.
We’re Here for You
At Sasco River Center, we understand the importance of social skills in child development. Our team of specialists offers support to help children learn and practice the skills they need to build meaningful connections and thrive in social situations.
Contact us today to learn more about our programs and services designed to nurture your child’s growth and confidence.
Register now for our free parent webinar on February 8: Friendship 101–Supporting Your Child in Building Friendships Through Play
Let’s work together to empower your child to form lasting, positive friendships through play.